


No Caviar for Kittens

by RedHead



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Not Beta Read, Olivarry, cat!Oliver, pure fluff, seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-14
Updated: 2015-12-14
Packaged: 2018-05-06 14:29:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5420606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedHead/pseuds/RedHead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Barry spends a week looking after his boyfriend, who happens to now be a kitten, and a grumpy one at that. Olivarry fluff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Caviar for Kittens

**Author's Note:**

  * For [starrxlorrd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrxlorrd/gifts).



 

“Mrow.”

“Uh huh.”

“Mrow!”

Barry snorted, looking at the indignant fluff ball fondly, “okay Ollie, what do you expect? Caviar?”

“Meow!”

Barry had to laugh, “ _no_! Come on, I'm not feeding caviar to a cat! You have a cat’s digestive system now, and this is what cats eat.”

The kitten—light orange and white and altogether too tiny to be a full grown adult cat—sat down and stared up at Barry in protest, tail flicking dangerously.

“Come on, man, you’re not making this easy. I’ve never had a cat before, I just asked the woman at the store what to feed—” Ollie swatted at Barry’s leg and he yelped. “Hey! That was claws! Augh, fine—no cat food. Jesus.”

He dumped out the bowl and Ollie followed his footsteps, almost causing Barry to trip. “You’re worse as a cat than a person; I didn’t even think that was possible.”

They magician they’d been fighting had decided the Green Arrow needed a lesson in humility, and of all things, she’d turned Oliver into a _cat_. Apparently it would wear off in about a week. Barry had been tempted to call Ollie’s sister Thea to help, but he could only imagine that his boyfriend would murder him if anyone in Star City got wind of him turning into a kitten. So Barry had taken to texting them on Ollie’s phone and pretending he _was_ Ollie, telling them he’d be gone for the week. He’d shown the text to the cat for approval before sending, and wasn’t it weird to see a cat _read_. At least his mental-faculties hadn’t turned cat-like as well.

He sighed and picked up the kitten, who immediately started to purr and then stopped with what could only be a put-upon expression on the feline face, flicking his tail at Barry’s nose.

“Yeah yeah,” he huffed, “you’re hungry, not cuddly. Just chill out on my shoulders for a few minutes and I’ll make you some meat. Cats are carnivores, I know _that_ much at least.”

The kitten scrambled on to Barry’s shoulders and perched there precariously, and it was sort of heartwarming in the way only kittens could be. It kind of sucked that he’d be down a boyfriend for the week, but the blackmail fodder was probably worth it, and Ollie _did_ make an adorable kitten. Barry was pretty sure he’d get scratched if he said as much.

“Pork? Pork. Good choice, Barry,” he told himself, Ollie purring just a bit at the commentary. Barry tried not to feel too smug.

 

*****

 

The week passed relatively quietly. Cisco and Caitlin knew about cat-Ollie but they were it, and the kitten made it _very_ clear he didn’t appreciate the cat toys that Cisco brought over, though was more than pleased about the cream that Caitlin did. Barry was pretty sure cat-Ollie liked her more than him, really.

Nights were insufferable because Ollie was a night owl as human, and cats were straight-up nocturnal. Too many times something would just _crash_ in the middle of the night in his apartment and Barry would be left throwing a pillow in the general direction of Ollie.

“You’re worse than a real cat, Ollie! Go to sleep!”

“Mrow!”

“Ugh.” He put his head under a pillow and resigned himself to his fate.

 

*****

 

Then there were the times when Ollie would curl up on Barry’s lap, or if he was laying, on his chest, and it was too cute. Ollie would glare at Barry to cut off any teasing whenever this happened, but considering the glare was from a literal pile of fluff and cuteness, it did little to quell Barry’s shit-eating grin.

“You know I have a whole album of you as a cat, right?”

Ollie was kneading a comfy spot to sit and dug in his claws a little extra hard, forcing Barry to wince.

“Yeah yeah—no one must see the intimidating Green Arrow reduced to kittenhood.”

The cat turned and sat facing away, tail in the air.

“If only they could see how crazy you go for those temptations cat treats.”

The cat hopped off his lap and sauntered away, leaving Barry to snicker alone on the couch.

 

*****

 

“Wish you weren’t a cat today,” Barry sighed, coming in to his apartment. Ollie was up on the counter like the truly atrocious pet that he was. “ _C’mon_ man, off the counter.”

The cat flicked his tail and ignored Barry.

“You know that’d work a lot better if you’d pretended you couldn’t understand me.”

“Mrow.”

“Uh huh. C’mere, you.” Barry picked him up and cuddled him close, dropping onto the couch. “Remind me never to get in a fight with Sam Scudder again, okay? Guy’s a total dick. Missed your help.”

“Mew.” The cat nuzzled Barry in a rare display of proper kitten-affection.

“I know. Tomorrow, Ollie. Then you’ll be a real boy again.”

Ollie pulled back and gave him a flat stare.

“I ruined the moment?”

Looking put upon—how Ollie managed that as a cat was truly a feat—the kitten went back to nuzzling him.

 

*****

 

“For the record, Barry—”

“AUGH!”

Barry jumped a mile high in his bed, flailing for a second before regaining his composure. Ollie was back as a human, sitting cross-legged and naked right next to Barry, where his kitten-self had fallen asleep only a few hours before.

“Ollie!”

“As I was _saying_ —” Ollie huffed, clearly trying to smother looking amused and failing. “I didn’t expect caviar, but you ever try to feed me cat food again and I’ll smother you in your sleep.”

Barry groaned and laughed, falling back down to lay and stare at Oliver. “That was a _week_ ago. Have you been bottling that up this whole time?”

“That and a million other things.”

“Ugh,” Barry wiped a hand down his face. “No ‘thank you most wonderful boyfriend for looking after my sorry kitten ass all week’?”

Oliver smirked and stretched out, leaning half over Barry, pressing to his side. Barry swallowed tight, feeling a little flushed. “Thank you, most wonderful boyfriend,” oh he sounded almost predatory, “for looking after my sorry kitten ass all week.”

“Hi, Oliver.” It seemed right to properly greet him, as a human, all up in his space looking deliciously naked.

“Hi, Barry,” his eyes flashed, and he leaned in close, Barry’s heartrate starting to increase. “You know how frustrating it is to be a kitten while your boyfriend walks around in his apartment in nothing but his boxers for seven straight days?”

“Very?”

Oliver pulled Barry in for a searing kiss, and he was pretty sure he wasn’t leaving the bed anytime soon.

 

*****

 

“So where were you all week? Big bad in Central?” Thea asked when Ollie finally made it back to Star City.

“Just a _little_ situation,” he smiled, pocketing his phone. The background picture on it was a cute kitten sitting on Barry’s shoulder, his boyfriend smiling bright and leaning into the grumpy looking little fluff ball.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Idek, it's pure fluff and probably has typos (I'll edit more later) but I wanted to write and my cat *would not* leave my lap and was obstinate and I couldn't help but wonder what Oliver Queen would like as a cat (hint: probably the worst). 
> 
> I *may* do a companion-piece with Barry as a cat instead.
> 
> For Robby, because he deserves all the happy things.


End file.
